Failed Olympic Drinking Games

1. Take a shot every time you assume an oriental person is Chinese.

2. Take a drink every time Olympic Stadium is referred to as "The Bird's Nest".

3. Take a shot every time political conflict is mentioned in tandem with a competition.

4. Take a shot every time Michael Phelps wins a medal.

5. Take a drink every time you see Bob Costas with too much make-up on.

6. Take a shot every time Kobe goes to a Chinese "massage parlor".

7. Take a drink ever time you think you're watching men's swimming only to discover it's a women's event.

8. Take a shot every time your wife chastises you for smiling as they show that clip of the 2 women's volleyball players hugging and rolling in the sand together.

9. Scenes of Great Wall, bicycles, that weird leaning skyscraper, or Nintendo looking buildings = shot.

10. Don't drink every time you see a heterosexual male gymnast.