Teh Georgia Running Game

I'm pretty excited about the chance #24 Kendrun Malcome might play this weekend.

When was the last time you had this little faith in our RB's ability to:
#1. Run with authority.
#2. Hang on to the ball.
#3. Make big gains.

I was actually surprised Caleb King is averaging 5.2 yds/carry, but given we've been sending guys up the gut of an O-Line that hasn't opened up gaps I guess I should be "pleasantly" surprised. I enjoyed watching Aaron Murray carve up Tennessee's defense through the air, but the remainder of our schedule doesn't consist of Tennessee's defense. We've got to establish a running game that is competent, dependable, and sticky-fingered.

Malcome isn't a squirrely, juke-machine...he's a big, hard-running tailback who might spin his way into a few extra yards here and there. He ought to get a few carries in the first 1/2, but once we put it away give it to him often so he gets the reps. Start him in our impending loss to Kentucky, (cricket sound...cricket sound), then if he's the real deal let him split carries with the vets in the Cocktail Party.

If we're gonna be coughing up more balls than Christian LeMay's highschool-lady-friend we might as well get our youth some experience...am I right?

I'm pretty pumped because I'm finally getting some free-time to get up to Athens for a game. As you can tell by the splotchy posting I've been busy doing things that pay bills rather than blogging. Hopefully I'm catching a break just in time to leave the country later this month, but I'll try to get as much posting in as possible until vacation time. If not, I'll see you suckers in November when the Dawgs are back over .500.

GO DAWGS!

Why We Won't Lose to USC

It's getting to the point where before too much longer every Georgia fan (myself included) will being making bold predictions regarding the wins/loses of our beloved Dawgs for the 2010 season.

I'm seeing a trend that many fear our first lost will come at the hands of South Carolina.

Reasoning:
-Road Game, in one of the worst places to ever see a football game.
-No0b QB
-USC has an experienced team

-Our new defense hasn't faced an SEC opponent yet...well, technically true.

Our new defensive scheme will not have faced an SEC opponent. But our new Defensive Backs Coach, Scott Lakatos, coached the secondary of UConn last year and held the 'Cocks to 7 points and Stephen Garcia to a completion percentage of 42%.

So it is correct to say our new and (hopefully) improved defense hasn't faced a conference opponent. BUT to say our defensive coaching staff doesn't know what they're getting into couldn't be more wrong (which no one is saying, just thrown out for dramatics). Lets just hope Coach Lakatos kept his Trapper Keeper full of notes from UConn DC Todd Orlando, I think they'll come in handy.
GO DAWGS!

Coaching Staff Concerns

I went to a prayer breakfast up in Kennesaw today and Coach Mark Richt was the guest speaker.

This isn't spring-football related but he did mention that a member of the coaching staff was going through a tough time because his mother was dying of pancreatic cancer. He said he wasn't going to name names, but he used this example to tie in how you can spend your life trying to make mankind happy, but you're wasting your time because when it's over, it's over.

Of course he put it much more eloquently than I did, but this coaches father had already passed away due to cancer and his mother was presumed to have approx 6 months left (IF I heard that correctly).

This isn't an attempt to break news, it's more-or-less an attempt to bring some prayer concerns to those who care. I felt the need to pass this along because yesterday I discovered a member of our neighborhood supper-club passed away in January and my wife and I completely missed the boat on sending condolences to his wife.

So if you're the praying type, just remember those whom put on the show for us are real people and deal with life's crappy circumstances as well.

So Dabo wants to play ball, eh?

To be perfectly honest, I love the idea of a fauxpponent in the Spring Game.

Why not, Clem's boy?

In addition to the some groundrules about QB's being no-contact, as long as provisions are taken to ensure player safety (and get the back-ups some reps) I think it's a great idea.

Hell, if we're gonna have a throw-back opponent. Why not have a throwback coach come in and deliver a pep-talk?!?

Watch Coach Goff and his flat-billed ballcap tell you what "wins games".

Why Nick Montana Won't Be Wearing Red & Black

Unless you've been living under a rock you've heard the big news over the weekend. Nick and his father, Joe were in Athens scoping out the Classic City for the 2010 recruit. As incredibly awesome as the publicity of having Joe Montana's son be a Dawg would be...it ain't gonna happen.

Here's why.

We are deep in 2009 QBs...2 deep. Unless this kid is a rare example of patience shown in celebrity children, he'll be looking for field time right out of the gate. Aaron Murray and Zach Attack-Mettenberger are our two freshman stallions right now and either one could potentially stay 4-5 years (barring early drafts...but surely not both would leave early). Though it's a fact Nick doesn't mind competing for his position, he already went head to head with Wayne Gretzky's boy for snaps in high school. It's rumored Trevor Gretzky's dad lost a fortune betting on his son winning the position battle (If I make up rumors, you hear it here first).

Also, ESPN has a pretty rough breakdown of his weaknesses...

He possesses the mechanics to throw when off balance and just enough strength to get the ball where it needs to be, but he does not have an elite arm. If Montana's feet are not set or he is unsettled, he is not the same player in terms of accuracy and production. To get the most out of his arm, he must utilize his entire body and be mechanically sound. At times if pressured he will look flustered and lose zip and confidence in where he's going with the ball. As with Jimmy Clausen in 2007 who attended the same school we are concerned about the overall level of competition he faces each week. Overall, Montana is going to be a player that needs to be in the weightroom and add strength and bulk not only for arm strength improvements, but for durability as well. He has a late bloomers frame and the tools to really develop into a sound, competitive prospect at the next level. Best football is definitely down the road.

...the two words that should scare you, Jimmy Clausen.
Look this douche-nozzle in the frosted tips and tell me it ain't a complement.

Anyway, if Nick wants to be a Dawg he's gonna have to earn his starting time. Matthew Stafford had to prove his worth before he got his first start against UAB his Freshman year. Biggest difference? Nick isn't competing with Joe T-3 and Blake Barnes, we've got 2 of 2009's finest QBs ready to piss in the new kid's Powerade.

So, I think it'd be awesome to have Nick in Athens, but I doubt the atmosphere will overtake his desire for facetime landing him at Georgia. Sorry to start your Monday out on a sour note, but this dose of reality can't be any worse than...this news.

...oh Vince, I thought you were different.
(Camera guy, you gettin' this?)

FUN FACT:
Not only did Nick Montana compete against Wayne Gretzky's son, but they were throwing passes to Trey Smith...Mr. Wild Wild West's offspring. Coming soon to the Disney Channel, Celebrity Highschool Musical.

Quick thought

The morning show I listen to frequently uses the sound clip of Shaq's freestyle rap to Kobe Bryant in when he requests for Kobe to "Tell me how my ass tastes."

As I was watching old UGA videos on YouTube, I had a funny thought.

If he really wants to know how his ass tastes he should ask Uga for assistance. Robert Baker would be more than happy to provide him as a reference.


This video never gets old...unless you're Robert Baker.

Quick thought

My inner knowledge of all things tranny-fierce made me sense this was importent to comment on.

If you looked at Yahoo! this morning you may have noticed their announcement for fashionable colors for 2009.

If you were unaware, apparently 2009 is the year to look like a Marta logo.

...which brings me to this gem...

...shall we expect a follow up with "Bitch You Look Like a Marta Bus"?

Concerning Supplement Income

My wife might be the most intelligent person I know. She's a straight shooter who isn't afraid to tell you the truth if you need to hear it. Last night she made a statement encompassing each of the following ingredients:

1. Insult
2. Wisdom
3. Love
4. Insight
5. Sympathy

and

6. Criticism (which is slightly different from insult)

To make the setting, imagine we are sitting around the living room drinking some spiced tea to warm our spirits.

We discussed our drive to work that morning where she and I had both heard a portion of the same morning radio show. There is a member of said radio show who was known for his work donating sperm to supplement his income. I had heard this person say his last "donation" was rejected, but I left for my office when he was explaining why. Mrs. Mackalicious revealed to me he was diagnosed with Chlamydia and the sperm bank turned him away. She told me how upset he was because he counted on sperm donation for approximately $5,000 of his yearly income.

My jaw hit the floor. I had ZERO idea people got paid that much for sperm donations. The minute my wife saw my wheels turning, she put a stop to it with a quickness. She unleashed this statement which (as mentioned earlier) made me have a great appreciation for the woman she is.

"NO, NO, NO, NO!!! You are NOT going to do that! The only kids running around with 1/2 a brain looking like you are going to be MINE! So don't even think about it!"

If you really think about it, the depth in that statement is mindblowing. My only hope is that someday you, the reader, will be as lucky as I was in finding true love.

...but perhaps I should stop finding stuff like this funny first.

...one more thing about Kentucky

I'll admit I wasn't happy about the Kentucky game even though we won, but let me drop this bug in your ear.



I very well may be the only one making this correlation, and let me say for the record I DO NOT think the two are comparable on the level of importance to Bulldog history, but...

When I saw the first play of the TD drive where Stafford connected with MoMass for 77yds, a little piece of me was screaming "RUN LINDSAY!". Of course Buck Belue to Lindsay Scott will forever be one of the best moments in UGA football, but other than MoMass not making the most of his blocker, this would have been a similar situation. We would be on the verge of losing a game we should have won and in the final minutes we get a huge play for huge yardage.

I know they are completely different situations (so don't give me that crap about the Dawgs playing for an undefeated season during the Run Lindsay! call), but if I was over the fact we haven't lived up to our potential and was able to appreciate the Kentucky win for what it truly was (a pretty damn entertaining game), then I might be willing to underscore the silliness of the whole thing. I just know this would have been one of the moments a healthy Larry Munson would have been worth his weight in Munson's Greatest Calls DVDs had he been in Lexington last weekend.

FOLLOW UP: Does anyone have the Scott Howard audio to this drive?

Also, I love the Kentucky fan in the bottom right hand corner at minute 2:15-2:16 who appears to try and reach into the sky to grab the sun and then slam it to the ground once it becomes clear AJ Bryant...I mean AJ Green caught the pass. LOVE IT!

How Do You Bark?

Just a quick question for my fellow Dawg fans.

What do you hear/scream during UGA football kickoffs?

"GoooOOoOooooOoooooo DAWGS, Sic 'em! _____,_____,_____!!"

Would you say it's a "woof"? Gator fans seem to think it's more of an "ARP". I personally holler something to the effect of "AURRGHE!" during the barking segment of the kickoff tradition.

What do you say? (and please spell it out to the best of your ability)

Thank you.

Beaten Wife Syndrome +8 Ideas

Why do we do it to ourselves, Georgia fans? Every year I tell myself, "Maybe this time will be different", and it rarely is. We've got injuries, we've got a young Offensive Line, and we've had the most difficult schedule of any BCS team. Those are not excuses for not performing, those are reasons next year should be different. Like the beaten wife on the Lifetime television movies we always come back against the advice of our loved ones. We try to work it out, only to be hurt again in the long run, but we always look back at how good the good times were and wish it could be that way again.

You can't win 'em all, and sometimes when you do the BCS still doesn't have it in the cards for you (ask AUUBURN). The pain goes away as long as you're willing to let it go. I was lucky. Saturday after I changed the channel to Animal Planet to watch the OTHER World's Ugliest Dogs Competition, I deleted the proof from the DVR (you can tell a game is going poorly if it gets cleared before the 3rd Quarter), then I went to drown my sorrows at Pappadeaux's with fried seafood and drinks as we celebrated my Dad's birthday. Nothing helps heal a broken spirit like fried foods. Yeah it sucks to get asked the same annoying questions from your extended family's non-sports fans...

Aunt-"What happened to Georgia?"

Me-"We lost." (and I hope you get the hint from my short answer that I don't want to talk about it)

...but if you can bite your tongue and not be a smart ass to your family it'll pay off when the Last Will and Testament gets written. But you live to fight another day, and like I said before, you just hope and pray it'll be different next time.

Here is my list of 8 mediocre ideas...

1. Win out, for God's sake don't lose to Kentucky, Auburn, Tech, or whomever we're paired with in the Capital One Bowl. If you recall Florida had high hopes last year coming off their Championship winning season only to drop to Auburn, LSU, and eventually us. A four loss Michigan team handed them their final loss of the season and I'm going to go out on a limb and say the Gator Nation was none too happy. We've lost to two really good teams (currently #1 and #5), there's no shame in that considering the problems we're facing this year...it just sucks we couldn't make a game out of the most recent one. Turn it on for these last 4 and end on a high note.

2. Assume Matthew Stafford will be gone next year. He'd be a fool not to enter the draft after this season because you don't go any higher than #1. He's the best pro-style QB on the upcoming market and don't fool yourself into thinking he's going to stick around to get the fire beat out of him by SEC defenses just because he can. Just be glad he's a Dawg and will add to the stock of UGA creating professional grade athletes, it'll make us look good in the long run if he succeeds. As great as Tim Tebow is at Florida he's nothing but a glorified running back at the NFL level, just ask Alex Smith how well that Spread Offense worked out for him.

3. Hope Knowshon sticks around to up his stats and possibly his draft stock. Whomever we have at QB next year will need some senior leadership at the running position because he's not going to play at Stafford's level immediately. AJ Green will only be able to do so much to pull in passes, but we've got to have someone step up at running back (Caleb King might be that person, but I haven't seen it yet).

4. Be glad we're dropping LSU and Alabama from the schedule next year. Hallelujah! (CORRECTION: WE DON'T DROP LSU NEXT YEAR THEY PLAY US AT HOME...h/t J.Leonardjr) 2009 Schedule available here.

5. We've got a good group of young kids at the O-Line level, they've held their own this year being as green as they are. Hopefully they learned a valuable lesson this year and with a little health (please God let someone stay healthy) and a little luck, we'll be able to keep a new QB upright more than Matthew last Saturday.

6. Even though I am still hearing the soul-rattling *BONG* sound from Blair Walsh's second missed field goal, I still think he's one of the best kickers in the NCAA. Eventually we'll win a close one, and having Blair sticking his foot up a ball's @$$ to send it between two uprights will be huge. The kid is talented, he (just like the rest of us) couldn't catch a lucky break Saturday.

7. Be thankful Mark Richt is still your head coach. Call it a "hard learned lesson about showboating" or just another fluke loss to a talented Florida team, either way had the onside kick worked and jump started our offense we'd all be hailing him as a genius. He put his nuts on the chopping block for that call and took it like a man when it was time to place the blame. Yeah, I didn't like it, but I'm just some dummy with a laptop who thinks people care what he thinks.

8. Enjoy the World's Largest Outdoor Cocktail Party. Don't be one of those whiney fans who complains that it's not a neutral site. Yeah, we've had a tough time over the last 18 years, but before that stretch Florida went through the same thing (1971-1989 UGA won 15 of 19). We still lead the series (46-38-2) and even though we got our fudge packed last weekend we still hold the title of biggest @$$whippin' dished out(1942, UGA wins 75-0). Playing Florida in the Georgia Dome isn't going to change the fact Florida is a well coached, talented team. It isn't going to change the fact the fan numbers are split 50/50 from goalpost to goalpost. It isn't going to change the fact Jeanco's are the top selling pant in Gainesville. So stop whining about the last 18 years and save me me a fifth of Jack Daniels for the party next October. I'll see you in Jacksonville, I'll be the same drunk obnoxious Georgia fan parading around in red pants acting like I own the place that I always am. Only next time I'll be with my best friend who happens to wear jean shorts, drive a Camaro, wears hair gel, and owns several gold necklaces. I hate him.

Go Dawgs.

New Thoughts on Old Movies

I just watched Days of Thunder on one of the HD movie channels. I haven't seen this move since I was little and found a few new things to appreciate it.

#1. Robert Duvall's Georgia Bulldogs hat.
(couldn't find a picture but I wish I did)

#2. Apparently this...
...wasn't John C. Reilly's first NASCAR movie. Shake & Bake BABY!

#3. Tom Cruise wasn't driving the #18 Thetan car sponsored by the cult of Scientology.

#4. I look way better in a racecar than Cole Trickle.

Also, one final unrelated thought, Brian Darling is gonna be super-pissed Nick George is the new VP of Darling Enterprises...I'm KNEW Tripp was going to do that!

Franklin is to Auburn what Van Gorder is to Southern

I'm not one to criticise...oh hell, even I can't pull that one off. I'm always one to criticise. If I wasn't I won't be blogging about any random happening I think is total dog squeeze.

In my opinion Tony Franklin pushing a spread offense on Auburn was the equivalent of Brian Van Gorder chunking Georgia Southern's Option. It was a dumb idea, but it didn't really have any effect on me so why should I worry. Tubby was in a pickle to replace Gorgeous Al Borges before the Chick-Fil-A Bowl and in my opinion rushed his decision in picking Franklin to take over as OC.

On that same note when Brian Van Gorder left UGA for Georgia Southern's head coaching job, he scrapped the triple option that worked so well the I-AA team. Yeah, Franklin's offense didn't piss off everyone immediately like Van Gorder's idea did, but in the long run they both proved unpopular to large fanbases.

If nothing else this won't give Auburn a chance to have a moment when the players buy into the system like the Tennessee game in Coach Richt's first year. I don't recall where I first read that but I believe it factually to be a turning point. Either way, Franklin getting the boot leaves a good chance the Tigers/War Eagles/Plainsmen might be willing to lay down and concede this as a rebuilding year (which was already announced by multiple fans following the LSU loss, Miss State hockey-score debacle, and the Vandy loss). I'll give it to Tubby though, losing Al Borges and Will "BOOM MF'ER" Muschamp in the same year is a big ugly orange and blue suppository to have inserted into anyone's Hershey highway.


Just remember Auburn fans, Spurrier got the same perscription.

Just a thought...

If Matthew Stafford was a class act he'd request Wallace Gilberry send flowers to Larry Munson this year instead. But like I said, that's just a thought.

(because honestly, last year Gilberry got as close to Larry Munson as he did Matthew Stafford)