Thursday, February 25, 2010

Work has been bananas, B-A-N-A-N-A-S.

I don't know why I ever feel the need to explain myself when I don't post at least 3-4 times per week...but work has been insane this week and frankly, we're not playing football right now so what's the big deal?

Anyway, my inner commentator is screaming like a female curler to be expressed so I figured I'd throw it a bone.

In the wake of Spring Training and the Braves getting their roster worked out, Bernie made a trip out to Foley Field last night to watch the Diamond Dawgs man-handle a bunch of Presbyterians looking for a quick game after Wednesday Night Supper and Choir Rehearsal. As cold as it was out there I'm assuming cups weren't necessary, but either way Dawgs won 11-3 and Bernie was able to pick up his limited edition Chance Veasey ballcap. If you're able to make it up to Athens to catch a game sometime, make sure to make a donation to the Prayers for Chance fund. The first 500 people who donate $20 will get one of these hats for their generosity and you know it's going to a good cause.

In the wake of Herschel beating the dog squeeze outta some guy in Mixed Martial Arts, apparently Knowshon is testing the waters as well. From what I'm hearing some 18 year old got hopped up on goofballs and liquid courage then approached Mr. Moreno about his bicycle. Fortunately, Blogging Pantsless was able to obtain this exclusive video of the incident (NSFW)
Tough call on who made the worse decision, and I'm no lawya', but I'm going to assume this kid thinks he's going to get some of $$$uperman's money before it's all said and done.

AKC Dawg Show:
It could be that I've been so dang busy it slipped my mind, but I don't know how I could have completely forgotten that we don't have a mascot right now. David Hale does his best David Hale impression and gives us a great look into the goings on of the Seiler families search for UGA VIII. My favorite part is where Sonny delves into the PETA story and tells it like it is FAAAAAAR more eloquently than I would have.

Though I don't subscribe to the "Russ For 8" talk, I think Russ has done a great job with his role as fill-in. There is something to be said for patiently looking for the right Dawg for the job instead of seeing a void and filling it with any ol' dog. The good news is, no matter how "mascot-less" we might feel, at least we aren't trying to replace 80 years of tradition with a Star Wars character. If you asked me 10 years ago which NCAA school I thought would have a Star Wars character as their mascot, it likely would have been: It's really a better representation of their institution's interest AND female constituency.

Monday, February 22, 2010

Skeleton? Put it in the closet with the others.

To further compound my plan to never run for public office, a picture has surfaced from a party I attended last week. The picture below is from the Johnny Weir Viewing Party MY WIFE AND I attended last Thursday. People from across the state gathered to watch Johnny Weir's Free Skate Program last week and once everyone discovered he was the 2nd-to-last skater most of us just drank and went back home.

But aside from any excuses I could make to justify my presence at said event, I feel the need to make 3 points proving my heterosexuality.

#1. Wedding ring, left-hand.

#2. Look at the masculine grip I have on that rose...nothing gay about that.

#3. Closing argument, "Flora-Bama" coozie stuffed with Coor's Banquet...'nuff said.

Of course the glaring obstacle to these points is the "Queer 4 Weir" shirt I'm wearing, but Blogging Pantsless has been around 2 years. If this surprises you, then you haven't been paying attention.

Friday, February 19, 2010

Happy Birthday, Coach

...every 25 years, Coach gets a thumb.

I know we're a day late, but we started partyin' early yesterday and crashed early. When I turned 25 I got to eat BBQ three days in a row, went out drankin' with friends and ended up puking on the Downtown Connector. I'm going to go ahead and assume your 50th was twice as badass as that.

Tuesday, February 16, 2010

NBC's Olympic Athlete Application




In the following space please list all "special needs" relatives:

If you have no retarded relatives, please list deceased relatives for whom you would like your backstory based on:

If you have no deceased relatives who have inspired your competitive spirit, please name pets who's honor you will compete in:

If you have no pets, disabled relatives, deceased family members, or anything else we can exploit in an overly dramatic backstory; we at NBC ask that you only compete in Olympic events nobody watches (I.E. Biathalon...what kind of sport is that?!? Skiing and shooting a gun?!? pppttttt!!! Sounds more like my last trip to Sugar Mountain, NC if you know what I mean and I think you do! Seriously though, Biathalon is the worst.)


Bob Costas
NBC Commentator

Friday, February 12, 2010

Winter Olympics

I'm pretty pumped about the Winter Olympics. Until I got married and my wife introduced me to the greatness of Olympic sports, I had little to no interest in them. Yeah, when they were in Atlanta I went with my parents to see Boxing (and I got my picture taken with Butterbean...I'll have to post that one later), but I wasn't enthralled with it like I am now.

So, with the opening ceremonies kicking off, I wanted to post the greatest moment in sports history.

This was the equivalent of a college baseball team beating the Yankees. It's watching Appalachian State beat NOT MICHIGAN, but the New Orleans Saints. I would say it's like watching me (from my college years) taking down Roger Federer in a tennis match but the 1980 US Hockey team wasn't THAT awful.

Aside from sport, it was watching the beginning of the end of the Cold War. We beat the Soviets at their own game.

If I remember correctly, this is where the "U-S-A! U-S-A!" chant came from. And I like to believe without THAT chant, we have no "S-E-C! S-E-C!" chant.

If you haven't seen the movie Miracle, add it to your Netflix queue. It ranks just ahead of Cool Runnings in the "Best Olympic Movies" and slightly behind Chariots of Fire.

It also leads to awesome moments in parenthood like this.
...I could eat this child. No seriously, I want to bite him.

Wednesday, February 10, 2010

Your Favorite Olympic Athlete

The year, 1992. The Winter Olympics were held in Albertville, France. YouTube didn't exist...and neither did their "Embedding disabled by request" policy.

Few people remember this, but all Georgia fans had the same favorite Olympic bobsledder that year. Unfortunately the Olympic uniforms didn't include printing "34" in twelve inch lettering on the back.

Also, I remember 2 years ago watching replays of this video and thinking "Herschel Walker is doing MMA?!?"

After he demolished the competition in his first MMA fight last month, someone label Herschel Walker the "Alpha Human" on Twitter. You'll get no argument outta me. At 48 years old, if the man wanted to wear a bedazzled unitard and ice-dance with Johnny Weir, I wouldn't tell him no.
Do not poke the bulldog, or he will bite.

Tuesday, February 9, 2010

Super Bowl Photography Tricks

You know it's going to be a good day when someone sends you a semi-subtle gay joke pictorial to kick it off.

Thank you Fake've started my day on a high note.

...oh, Matthew

Don't get me wrong, I absolutely love Matthew Stafford. I thought he was a great talent for Georgia and if Detroit can be a little more Ford and a little less Chrysler then perhaps he'll get a decent career outta the Lions.

That being said, it pains me to see him pushing AXE products.

Though I can see how advertising this stuff makes Middle School boys (who have no concept of smell radius) want to bathe in the stuff...but I like to think most grown men file this between "gold necklaces" and "Ed Hardy tshirts" in the category of Stuff Real Men Don't Actually Wear.

The product has more life in satire than shelf.

Matthew, if it makes you money by all means go for it...but we all know you don't need it. You don't have to smell like a middle school boy's locker room to get women. We saw your performance against Cleveland, and we know you're a man.

Of course, this is coming from a guy with a receding hairline and a 5 year marriage. Perhaps my idea of manhood falls more within the bounds of hard work and being a good husband, but there is something to be said for sewing your wild oats in your early 20's. More power to you. Have fun, kids.

Wednesday, February 3, 2010

Signing Day Broadcast

If you weren't aware, has a link to their live streaming broadcast of Signing Day 2010.

Its a great set-up.

Tuesday, February 2, 2010

Da'Rick Rogers, Volunteer.

From what we are all hearing, Da'Rick Rogers switched commitments from UGA to Tennessee.

Does it suck to lose a great WR prospect? Yes.

Does it suck to lose him to a conference rival? Yes.

Does it suck that said rival is Tennessee? Abso-frickin'-lutely.

But you know what sucks even more? Having a bunch of Georgia fans (the term "fan" used loosely) harassing the kid for his decision via Twitter, Facebook, etc...

We wanted him, we didn't get him, water under the bridge. You burn furniture when your head coach skips town, not when a 17 year old boy doesn't want to be on your football team.

Da'Rick doesn't have to worry about sports writers, UGA bloggers, or Georgia fans in general...and he sure as hell doesn't have to worry about what douchebags like Jeffrey Johnson think of him.

The only people Da'Rick Rogers has to worry about crossing paths with are this guy now...

...and this guy later.

Save your worries for the Fall. Tomorrow is about celebrating who wants to be a part of our program. Good luck to the kids signing with their respective teams tomorrow, and may the best team win.

Go Dawgs!

Monday, February 1, 2010

Jeff Whitaker Announcing Today

I know Signing Day is a couple days away, but unless I'm mistaken, Warner-Robins' defensive lineman Jeff Whitaker will be announcing his decision today.

Apparently this kid could be the future of CTG's D-Line at nose tackle. We're in the running with OurBarn and Miami, but I see this as being the first big splash for our defense and a recruiting victory for Grantham if he chooses UGA.

Here's his bio per Rivals...

Why I like our chances:
I like the placement of the "official visit", we came after Auburn, and before Miami. That puts forward the perfect scenario of going from Auburn (beyond Thunderdome) to Athens (indoor plumbing + electricity + 5 Star Day Cafe) to Miami (rampant gun-violence and Scarface scenarios).

Plus the kids from in-state and appears to have a good head on his shoulders.

Why he might not sign:
Per David Hale's post, Mr. Whitaker is quoted as saying:
"The thing I tell people all the time is that Georgia will be great with me or without me. It’s a great football program, and they have a great coaching staff."

...of course this was made last week and he might not have been trying to appear biased one way or the other. I like the kid, I want him as a Dawg and whomever he signs with will have a heckuva player.

AJC is reporting a 2PM announcement. They are assuming he's leaning Auburn...we'll see.